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Enlighten Me: Single mothers beauty pageant

Eli Chen/Delaware Public Media

Traditionally, beauty pageants are known as competitions among young, physically appealing women. It’s not often that you come across one where the contestants are mothers-- or more specifically, single mothers.

Recently, management services company Destined2Be put on a “Single Moms Beauty Pageant” at Dover Downs, to celebrate the plight of single mothers.

And for this week’s Enlighten Me, Delaware Public Media’s Eli Chen attended the event.

When I enter the ballroom at Dover Downs, top 40 hits are blasting.  A curtain-draped runway extends out into the center of the room. Crystal centerpieces and flower bouquets placed on the sides of the stage. Dozens of families are gathered around banquet tables, eating, drinking, making light conversation. Small children are chasing each other between the tables. Everyone is killing time, waiting for the contestants of Delaware’s first single moms beauty pageant to come back on stage.

“Ladies and Gents, the 2015 contestants for Miss Phenomenal Mom…" said pageant host Helen Jackson.

The curtain lifts to reveal 10 contestants wearing evening gowns. This is the very last portion of the event, after the talent show and speeches about motherhood.

The winner of the statewide Miss Delaware USA beauty pageant, steps out to make an appearance. She’ll crown the winner of Miss Phenomenal Mom 2015.

“I’m happy to announce we have here tonight, Miss Delaware USA, Renee Boyle!”

And singer, Sonya Lachelle, emerges from the stage to belt out a song.

Suffice it to say, there were a lot of emotions cycling through the room. A couple of the contestants are noticeably wiping tears.

Afterwards, the host, Helen Jackson, comes back up, preparing to announce the top four contestants. But before she does, she makes sure to emphasize how unique this event is.

“This is the first year this has ever been done in Delaware. I doubt it has ever been done anywhere,” said Jackson.

The idea of a single mothers beauty pageant raises eyebrows. That’s because many of us see beauty pageants as superficial events that celebrate young, physically attractive women who have yet to build any sizable real life experience.  The women competing at this beauty pageant are being celebrated precisely because they lead tough lives.

Candice Jackson, who organized the event on behalf of her management services company, Destined2Be, is a single mom herself. It was her father’s death last October that pushed her to start working on this project.

“It’s in honor of my mother and it’s a tribute to my dad, if that makes sense," said Jackson. "My mom is my rock and I always wanted to make her proud.”

Miss Phenomenal Mom isn’t the only award they’re handing out. The day before, the contestants had a luncheon where they handed out scholarships to help contestants planning to attend Wilmington University. And Bisa Smart won the Miss Congeniality award.

“B as in beautiful, I as in intelligent, S as in Sweet and A as in adorable,” said Smart.

Bisa was born in Trinidad and then grew up in Florida, where she participated in beauty pageants when she was younger. Later, she moved to Delaware and had her three and a half year old son, Chad, with her now ex-husband.

Credit Eli Chen/Delaware Public Media
Bisa Smart is crown the winner of Delaware's first beauty pageant for single mothers.

“There’s so much deeper in this meaning to being in this pageant than being up on that stage and showcasing a gorgeous dress," said Smart. "My mission is to help as many young ladies as possible to recognize how wonderful and how fantastic they are, without anyone of the opposite sex, if you will, to recognize them for that to feel that confidence.”

Many of the contestants, like Bisa, effused with inspirational insights like these on stage as well. At the last part of the evening, after the final four women were singled out to be judged, Candice’s mother, Helen, delivered the questions.

"Christina, as a single mom, how do you promote positive self-esteem and confidence in your children so they can succeed?" Helen asked.

"To promote and give self confidence in my children, I encourage them..." said Christina.

And then, after a period of waiting for the judges to deliberate, the winners were chosen. And Bisa Smart ended up the winner.

“The new 2015 Miss Phenomenal Mom is Miss Bisa Smart.”

It’s not a bad idea to throw a glamorous event to celebrate mothers. Our culture reminds us all the time how underappreciated they are, and single mothers, even more so. They’re the ones who have to give birth to us and on top of that, take on the daunting responsibility of raising us into, hopefully, functional members of society. But Bisa has pretty high ambitions.                 

“There are people out there who love you, there are people out there who adore you, respect you, look up to you and continue to do the right thing because you could be raising the next Barack Obama,” said Smart.

And Candice couldn’t be happier with the way it turned out. Her thoughts have not only jumped to Delaware’s second annual single moms beauty pageant--she’s also getting requests to put on a single dads pageant. So single fathers, stay tuned.