Less than two months after marriage equality became law in Delaware, wedding bells have been ringing non-stop for same-sex couples—and cash registers have been ching-ing for businesses that cater to the wedding industry.
In gay-friendly Rehoboth Beach, a florist reports sales are blooming, up 35 percent. There’s a flurry of advertising in a magazine published by an advocacy group. Throughout the state, musicians are booking gigs at ceremonies and receptions. Photographers are snapping pictures.
“It’s a momentous sea change of culture,” says the Rev. Tim Rodden of Newark, who will reaffirm his vows with the Rev. Randy Clayton on Sept. 29. “There is a wave of celebrations.”
Bed of Roses florist Vito Biasi discusses the early impact same-sex weddings have had in Delaware.
Bed of Roses florist Vito Biasi discusses the early impact same-sex weddings have had in Delaware.
[flashvideo file=http://www.wdde.org/wp-content/uploads/2013/08/florist.flv image="none"/]
Delaware is one of only 13 states to legalize marriage equality, making the First State a destination for same-sex weddings. Rehoboth ranks No. 4 on the CheapFlights.com international list of top Lesbian Gay Bisexual and Transgender (LGBT) wedding sites, between Montevideo, Uruguay, and Saba, in the Dutch Caribbean. (The No. 1 spot went to Newport, R.I.)
Service providers are feeling the love, too. The national average tab for a wedding is $28,427, according to a 2012 survey by TheKnot.com and WeddingChannel.com, with same-sex couples expected to spend slightly more. (A separate survey by TheKnot and The Advocate, an LGBT magazine, reports that 86 percent of gay couples will foot the bill for their nuptials themselves, compared to 40 percent of straight couples.)
Pent-up demand jump-started the boom. At 12:01 a.m. on July 1, one minute after House Bill 75 became law, John Brady, the clerk of the peace in Sussex County, began marrying same-gender couples.
Since then, he has been presiding over weddings non-stop. On one whirlwind Saturday in July, Brady officiated at nine marriages, including a couple who had been waiting for 55 years to exchange vows.
“John was scheduled to officiate at a wedding at 4:30 p.m. and he was so busy he couldn’t keep to the schedule,” says Steve Elkins, executive director at CAMP Rehoboth, a nonprofit gay and lesbian community organization. “Finally, at 5:15 he came running in, did the wedding and then had to dash off to do another one.”
CAMP Rehoboth already has booked receptions at its conference center through much of 2014. Advertising in Letters from CAMP Rehoboth, a 120-page magazine published 15 times a year, is up 25 percent.
“Now caterers who wouldn’t give us the time of day are clamoring to advertise,” Elkins says. “We also are getting lots of ads from deejays and officiants.”
He and Murray Archibald, his partner of 35 years, will have a church wedding followed by a cocktail reception for 150 guests at CAMP Rehoboth in September. A jazz quartet will provide live music.
“I wanted to elope, but Murray’s mother said she would kill him if we did,” Elkins says.
Archibald’s mother will stand up for him in church. Elkins will be attended by his sister. Each man will wear a gold wedding band handed down by his father.
“We will wear suits, but not matching,” Elkins says. “We are writing our own vows and designing our own service.”
Rony Tennenbaum, a New York-based jeweler who specializes in designing rings for same-sex couples, says the etiquette of gay weddings is evolving. He believes formal engagements will eventually become part of the equation.
“The same-sex community has stepped over engagement as part of the process because we were so caught up in changing laws,” he says. “In years to come, we will see gay people getting engaged just like straight people, except you will have two people proposing instead of one.”
Tennenbaum travels extensively, educating mainstream jewelers on strategies for serving same-sex couples. Still, he believes gay merchants have an advantage in the market.
“We aren’t just chasing the pink dollar,” he says. “This is from us, for us. People like putting money back into their community.”
He predicts couples who live in states that have not enacted marriage equality will travel to states where they can legally tie the knot rather than opt for a civil union.
“A civil union doesn’t do much for couples from a legal standpoint,” he says. “It’s like registering at Bloomingdales.”
Tennenbaum and his partner, who will marry in October, each wear three slender rings: a diamond band, a ring with a purple Alexandrite solitaire, and a recently added diamond solitaire.
“It’s our engagement ring,” he says.
Tennenbaum designed 14-carat white gold rings embellished with conflict-free black diamonds for Clayton and Rodden, who have invited 400 friends, relatives and associates to share their joy when they reaffirm their vows at First and Central Presbyterian Church in Wilmington, where both clergymen serve as parish associates.
“We got married in California in 2008 on the spur of the moment because we were there and it was legal,” Rodden says. “But now that marriage equality is the law in Delaware, we want to reaffirm our vows because this is our home, the place where we live.”
Clayton says weddings are a lot more fun now that gay people are no longer excluded.
“Going to weddings used to make me sad because I couldn’t get married,” he says. “Recently we went to the wedding of the daughter of a friend and I felt very different. I understood why weddings are so happy.”
Neighboring Pennsylvania and New Jersey do not recognize same-sex marriage. But Maryland does, and it didn’t take long for mainstream venues there to begin marketing to gay couples. The Four Seasons Hotel in Baltimore sent its director of catering to the Gay Wedding Institute in New York City for sensitivity training. The hotel printed glossy brochures featuring photographs of gay couples and will start distributing them in September.
TheKnot.com launched a digital magazine for same-sex couples in June and is selling cake toppers depicting two brides and two grooms. Macy’s printed a catalogue with a cover depicting a lavish, multi-tiered wedding cake with two grooms in black tuxes. Tiffany & Co. features a gay couple among the love stories on its What Makes Love True app and website.
Scott Ellis, founder of Ellis Photography in Wilmington, photographed two commitment ceremonies for same-sex couples last year and is looking forward to shooting weddings. He is confident wedding photography for LGBT couples will fast become an important segment of the industry.
“This is not a blip in the market,” Ellis says. “I fully expect to be taking family portraits and anniversary pictures down the road for these couples, who have finally gotten what is rightfully theirs.”
Vito Biasi, owner of Bed of Roses, a Rehoboth florist, remembers going to have his picture taken with his partner 10 years ago. It was frustrating working with someone who didn’t understand the gay community.
“It was difficult because the photographer didn’t know how to pose us,” he says. “We wound up having to pose ourselves.”
Biasi began designing packages for commitment ceremonies when Delaware legalized civil unions on Jan. 1, 2012.
But the response paled in comparison to marriage equality. Since July 1, business is up 35 percent, ranging from a few hundred dollars for boutonnières and bouquets for a quiet beach wedding to $18,000 for a wedding with 150 guests, including flowers for the couple and their attendants, arrangements for the church and centerpieces for the reception.
“Marriage equality has been fantastic for business,” he says. “So many people have waited a long time for this—and I don’t see it slowing down.”